A question-and-answer session with two women business owners who know what it’s like to be in business with your spouse. Rosemary Beck and her husband Jon are the  owners of TimeTrak Systems of Arizona and Marion Hook and her husband Jim are owners of Adobe Rose Inn Bed and Breakfast, and Adobe Rose Buttermilk Scone Mix.

Who should go into business with a spouse? 

Rosemary Beck: “As with any successful relationship, a successful business partnership between spouses can take many forms. However, I believe there are some basic components that are required. Most importantly, there must be a high level of trust between the partners. Each must know that the other will fulfill their responsibilities and make decisions that are in the best interests of the business. There must also be a high level of respect between the partners. Each must know that the other has the competencies required of their position. I think it is also helpful if both partners have comparable tolerances for risk, work ethic, and goals.”

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Marion Hook: “Actually, working with a spouse is not a good idea for every couple. It won’t work if you invite your spouse into your business as a last resort or to solve a problem that you couldn’t solve by yourself. A business relationship with your spouse should be carefully planned. The two of you need to know and believe in the mission of the business so that you always have the same focus point.  Don’t get stuck in traditional gender roles. You need to know each others strengths and weaknesses and assign each portion of the business in a manner that accentuates those strengths and makes certain that the weaknesses are compensated for. Spouses who have complementary skill sets have an advantage over those spouses who work and think exactly alike – especially when it comes to problem solving.”

How do you handle spousal competitiveness?

Beck: “I think it helps if the spouses have complementary skill sets and responsibilities. That way each person can work and perform at their highest level without stepping on the other’s toes.”

Hook: “Recognize that competiveness is going to exist and talk about it with each other. More importantly, LISTEN carefully to each other’s ideas for the business. If the ideas differ drastically, negotiate to find a middle ground.  Park your ego and don’t be afraid to admit that your idea just doesn’t work as well as you thought it would and move forward together, working to find another idea that will solve a problem.  Be nice to each other and treat your spouse with the same level of respect that you would treat any person with whom you have worked. We are both competitive by nature and realize that an occasional blowup will happen.  When a blowup occurs, understand that your spouse will take criticism more personally than others with whom you have worked.  Trust your spouse to do the right thing to build the business. Promise accountability for your part of the business and keep that promise or discuss why that promise can’t be kept.”

How do you separate home from work, marriage issues from business issues?

Beck: “All couples have multiple demands on their time and energy. For us, the business is just one more demand. In fact, we have often referred to our business as our ‘third child.’ It is one more item to include in the overall balance of your life together. Some couples compartmentalize: business at the office during business hours; marriage at home during off hours. Others are able to let their lives and their specific demands ebb and flow as needed. Communication and willingness to adopt the same ‘protocol’ is what makes it all work.”

Hook: “This is the toughest part in our business as we are on call 24/7. I agree with Rosemary that having a business together is like having a child – it’s omnipresent all of the time. When we leave the inn for more than a day trip, we actually hire an ‘innsitter’ to watch our ‘baby.’  We have also learned to schedule time that is just for us and to schedule time apart from each other. We attend lunches, networking events and conferences both with each other and not with each other. It’s also important to understand that those ‘little quirks’ that you find amusing in your marriage may not be amusing at all in your business. We have learned to set boundaries such as never allowing guests into our private quarters.  We set up times when business is not discussed. We talk about a movie, a play, a concert, family, vacation, politics – anything but the business. What matters the most in work/business issues and in home/marriage issues is really great communication skills.  They are necessary from the start if working with a spouse is going to be successful.   

Contact Rosemary Beck, owner of TimeTrak Systems of Arizona, at rbeck@timetrak.com or (520) 889-4877 or Marion Hook, owner of Adobe Rose Inn Bed and Breakfast and Adobe Rose Buttermilk Scone Mix, at innkeeper@aroseinn.com or (520) 318-4644. Both Beck and Hook are members of the Greater Tucson Chapter of the National Association of Business Owners (NAWBO). The Women in Business column appears the fourth week of each month.